Monday, June 23, 2014

Share Your Friend Grief Story

Believe it or not, the final two books in the Friend Grief series will be published this fall. I’m looking for additional stories for both books. Do you have a story that will fit one of them?

Workplace grief

The next book is titled Friend Grief in the Workplace: More Than an Empty Cubicle. The stories in it are about people coping with the death of a co-worker who was also a friend. Don’t let the title throw you off, though: I have a pretty broad definition of workplace. There are already stories of friends who worked together at a coffeehouse, a TV studio, a newspaper, a firehouse. Maybe you’re an actor or dancer, a server or bartender, a medical professional or teacher. You see? Any kind of workplace.

Life Changes

The final book in the series is as yet untitled, and is a wrap-up of sorts. It will focus not on the grief itself, but the ways in which people channeled their grief. Some of the people in it have made dramatic life changes, their friend’s death acting as a wake-up call. Some of the people in it decided to carry on their friend’s work or passions. But all have very different lives because of their friends.

Maybe you have a story that fits one of these books. Maybe you know someone who does. Maybe you saw a story on the news that would be a great addition.

If so, please email me ( with a brief description. Deadline: July 15. I will contact you and we can figure out how best to discuss your story (email, Skype, in person, etc.).

And by the way, Friend Grief won’t end when this series ends.

Thanks in advance and stay tuned!

1 comment:

trent bolesky said...

I lost my only son in a car accident four tears ago when he was only sixteen. the following is the chapter from my new book, The King's Lion ... Bound for Home! where i write about the raw emotions and working through the grief. I hope this helps others as well. Chapter 23
We Hug, We Cry, and We Say Good-bye

Before I begin to write this chapter, I will make a bold warning … this sad dark chapter is very different than the rest of this book!
Up to this point I have had a creative wealth of fun describing T. J.’s joyful, animated existence and glorious, inspirational times which he spent here on this earth. I tell readers about his brief life within the gratifying framework of the silly-hearted stories, and heartwarming moments that I, as his father and his friend, recall from his blessed and miraculously cheery life.
This unwelcomed chapter will touch that intensely sobering, dark part of his story, his sudden tragic death, and how that unwelcomed event has impacted me and continues to taunt and torment me as well. I genuinely wanted to skip over or just ignore this gloomy final part of his earthbound journey. I feel that I have honestly told this part of his life’s story too many hundreds if not thousands of times. Additionally, I had determined that to provide details surrounding his tragic death as a teenager, may not fit very well into this tongue-in-cheek, lighthearted book of warm, familial reflections.
My wife Carrie was adamant that I needed to tell readers about his death because it is a real part of his life, his story, and God’s plan for his ongoing legacy as well. Therefore, if this awkward, misfit chapter takes you off guard or slightly appalls you, then please blame that on her. Just kidding.
I will, however, go to a dark, gruesome, unhealthy place inside, which I only tap into on rare occasions. This is genuinely unlike me, or my glass-half-full style of character to dwell for too long in this morbid place, or speak at length in this chilling regard very often. As I mentioned in my prelude to this book, writing T. J.’s story has been a great source of personal therapy, and therefore, getting out and releasing some of the deep clutter of blistering, branded scars, intense grief, and lingering hurts that are bottled up underneath the surface, will help with my continued ongoing healing. Going to that dark sobering place and working through the intense pain is like finally taking a breath deeply into my lungs of fresh, pure, cleansing air. I can finally breathe freely again, and smell the sweet aroma of the pure-white, silky essence of a loving God.
I hope that witnessing my attempts at working through the bitter struggles helps you as well. But for those individuals who do not embrace death, or have never lost a close friend or a loved one, then this gruesome chapter may be too far over the socially-accepted lines of discussing death and its lingering impacts upon us. I meander into a dark world that few comprehend or desire to understand. I am not positive that I honestly understand it either. Working through the painful, scattered emotions after the death of a loved one, is like trying to ride an unbroken stallion bareback, while simultaneously attempting to herd allusive demons or corral spooky ghosts that haunt us from a world which we do not genuinely dwell in or comprehend. I do know, however, that I need to get some of this out to continue growing and striving forward and stretching my faith and reaching higher. So thanks for momentarily indulging me in this heavy-hearted endeavor.